In this first post for Summer 100, I am going to discuss masturbation through my lifetime, and how it has changed dramatically over the last 20 years.
My first sexual experience was when I was 17. The relationship lasted for two years during which time my boyfriend introduced me to the wonders of oral sex. The relationship ended when I was 19, and I subsequently had a series of other boyfriends with whom I had (bad) sex, but I don’t remember ever masturbating. I do recall having sexual desires and feeling horny, but I don’t think there was any masturbating until my early twenties. That involved using my fingers to bring myself to orgasm, and I do remember how fabulous those orgasms were. I don’t know why I didn’t masturbate earlier than this. My Messy Room blog has an interesting post on eliminating shame in masturbation, and has made me wonder if I did feel embarrassed. Which I certainly don’t nowadays!
My first sex toy was a flesh-coloured vibrator purchased from an Ann Summers shop in around 1999, before internet shopping had made a real impact. It looked like a cock, and I used it on my clit to bring me to orgasm. The vibrations weren’t very powerful, but were adequate to get me off.
By the time I purchased my next sex toy, the world had changed significantly with the availability of online shopping. It was a g-spot rabbit from Lovehoney, purchased in 2011. The shaft didn’t do much for me, but the vibrating rabbit ears worked their magic on my clit after a few minutes or so. I adored the fact that I could masturbate and achieve orgasm using a sex toy – it made me feel empowered, and as if I had discovered a magic world. I still used my fingers to masturbate, but that was becoming less frequent.
A couple of years later, I learned about wand vibrators. I liked the look of a mini wand from Lovehoney, as it was inexpensive and discreet. This tiny, powerful toy soon became my new best friend; at that time, the first setting was powerful enough to bring me off very quickly. However, before long the lowest setting no longer had an effect, and I moved to level two. After a short time, I could only orgasm on the highest setting. I occasionally tried to masturbate with my fingers, but I found that this no longer had the same effect, and trying to reach orgasm manually was hard work.
So, the tiny mini wand and the ears of the rabbit were my sources of orgasm from masturbation for a couple of years. That is until I acquired a Doxy massager. After using the Doxy, the mini wand became redundant as it had no effect on my clit whatsoever, although I continued to use the rabbit ears to achieve orgasm if it was inappropriate for me to have the loud Doxy out to play!
By now, it was 2016 – just two years ago. I met a wonderful man, who was delighted to discover my love of sex toys. We talk openly, and without any embarrassment, about masturbation, and enjoy sharing our experiences. Isabelle discusses how she is more comfortable in discussing masturbation with her husband.
Since 2016, my clit has been battered and bruised by many powerful sex toys. What were deep and strong vibrations to my clit a few years ago are no more than a light tickle nowadays. My fingers may occasionally stray to my pussy, but they deliver pleasant, yet mild sensations – certainly not enough to achieve a toe-curling orgasm.
Over the years, my clit has gradually become used to quickly reaching orgasm through the use of powerful sex toys, including my latest acquisition, a Doxy 3 . My clit no longer responds as well to human touch (mine and that of others), nor will it produce a mind-blowing orgasm at the mere touch of a gentle vibration like it used to. Although a probing tongue still hits the spot with explosive results.
It seems, for me, reduced sensitivity to manual stimulation is a natural effect from using powerful toys. This is something I have been pondering on for some time, and I am interested to know if others have a similar experience.
Click the Summer 100 image to see who else is taking part