The prompt for this week’s Wicked Wednesday is ‘Believe in Yourself’.
The beginning of a new year is a fresh start for many of us. Not everyone believes in New Years resolutions, but even so, it is a time to stop and think what you want to accomplish, what you want to try and what you want to stop with. Even if you don’t have any resolutions or ideas for this year, I want to say: believe in yourself! Let’s start this year off on a positive note.
I am conscious that I am opening this post in a negative way… but believing in myself is something that I struggle with immensely. I don’t tend to say much about the way I’m feeling on my blog or on Twitter, as I like to, at least, look positive, even if I don’t feel it. Low self-esteem and anxiety have both been a big shadow over my life since childhood ; ‘self-deprecating’ was an expression someone used to describe me very recently. The anxiety has been heightened in the last few years by medical and career issues, which has forced me into a vicious circle of exhausted emotions. I know that a few people I follow on Twitter also experience anxiety and self esteem issues. so I know that I am not alone and among good company!
What I would like to accomplish during this year is to be able to manage these two issues more effectively, to stop being my own worst critic and start believing in myself more. I am not sure that I will ever be able to eliminate them completely, but to be able to make them less intrusive would be an achievement. I also desperately need to make career changes and try and reduce the anxiety I have surrounding this.
I made some major changes regarding the sexual side of my life in 2015, but I need to ensure that my confidence issues don’t cause this to stagnate, which could happen very easily.
I enjoy writing my blog, and am delighted that people take the time to read it, so I shall endeavour to continue. However, I probably won’t be blogging about this particular topic very frequently, if ever again!
To finish on a a positive note, this prompt has provided a good opportunity for me to write about something that I would normally avoid sharing with people. Hopefully, kicking myself up the arse ‘publicly’ will ensure that I deal with it appropriately and make believing in myself one of my key accomplishments for 2016.
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